Rain Boot Fiasco

Hello Boys and Squirrels

This week has been pretty eventful because the other day I woke up at nine in the morning to call into work and I heard the sound of rain, so I looked out my window and saw that it was pouring, ( i mean it had ripped of some palms from the palm tree next to my house, which is always a sign of intensity in my book) so I though to myself man, I need rainboots ( because I'm short)
Yeah short people have to cross lakes when it rains, unless were olympic pole vaulters, then we can just jump over that shiz. However I'm not an olympian and did not own a paddle boat with which to canoodle down the street in, so I thought the next best thing : RAINBOOTS!

I went down to my local target and saw a pair of rainboots and was like, "These will do, but I just want target employees to know that today they did not hit the bullseye with my purchase because I was looking for more varity of choices." Once I got the boots however I realize I would not be venturing out into the storm for the rest of the day. Then the next day when I woke up there was no rain, and I was angry because I had it on a very reliable source that it was suppose to rain alot in the next couple of days (Nobody listen to the weather forecasters they terrible people who spread there lies and make you believe that it will be raining when it won't be. Eff you weatherman! You can be expecting nasty letters from me in the future)

So today I woke up and it was dizzling and I was like, "Yes!" and I jumped up for joy and I threw on my $25 rain boots and then yelled, "Suck that mother nature". Except for as my morning progressed it got hotter and the rain stopped, and I realized one should never yell "Suck that" at mother nature because I probably ginxed myself (go me). However I look on the bright side, so while everyone was staring at me today and saying to themselves that I was weird for wearing rainboots when it wasn't raining. I was sending my own message that went something like this,



The message of this story was, "I'm not part of your system"

Peace out sucka!